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Apples, Oranges and Bus W***ers (aka Lemons)

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SOCCER-Chelsea-162154_081There are more ways than one to win a game of football. Usually it involves having the ball, but not always. Brendan Rodgers and Liverpool FC have showed this season they don’t necessarily need to have the majority of possession to win a game of football. They prefer it, but don’t need it.

Apples.

Real Madrid went to Munich this week and won convincingly, without being too bothered with the football. They wanted it, but not at any price. Last week they entertained Bayern at Estadio Santiago Bernabéu. They didn’t particularly fancy the ball then either. Still won the game though. Did they park the bus? I don’t think so. They did good things with the football when they had it; things that Bayern were unable to cope with.

Chelsea did it though, bless them. I could go on a lengthy rant about values, principles and the moral obligation of entertaining the crowd, considering they are in the entertainment industry and all. But I won’t. I’m tired of thinking about them, the bus w***ers. It’s their thing, as Eden Hazard said himself, and I hope they choke on it. Oh, wait a minute. They sort of did, against Atletico Madrid. I was very happy about that, because I get terribly vexed when football loses. Like it did at Anfield, when Liverpool lost a battle in the moral war.

Oranges. Or is it lemons?

On Monday night, another one awaits. Another battle. It’s starting to drain me; I can feel it. I don’t have many emotions left in me at this stage of the season, and just want it to be over. LFC win or LFC lose – I get tired just thinking about it right now. Weekdays exist just as a come-down and a pick-me-up. But when match day comes they don’t matter. Nothing before, nothing after. Just the here and now.

Whether Crystal Palace turn out to be apples, oranges or the third option – whatever you decide that might be – remains to be seen. Tony Pulis is one of them. One of them. Those who aren’t as nice as others. José Mourinho, Sam Allardyce and Tony Pulis. The Others. Long grass, dry pitch and hot changing rooms. A swift kick to the knee when nobody is watching. Anything to get a result. Anything to win. With or without the football.

Except I’m not entirely convinced Tony P is as bad as I thought he was. I think I have spotted a change. Not quite as nasty, not quite as dogged. More of the football, less of the other things. Maybe the flamboyance of London is getting to him.

Or maybe it’s all just wishful thinking. Wishing it to be a footballing contest, wishing less of the other stuff. Less lemons, more football. We do football and we should be proud of it. No matter the outcome.

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