Luis Suarez: Questions and Answers

THE morning after the night before, after the night before: The sun is still in the sky, dogs chase cats, oranges are orange and I have precisely zero voicemails from Mila Kunis professing her undying love for me.

So despite the ramblings of a Uruguayan with a selective memory the world appears unchanged! Let’s be honest though, the disappointment we all felt was akin to Hulk Hogan switching allegiance to the NWO. It was in the end not entirely surprising.

The dust in mind (there is a lot of it) has somewhat settled, so I thought I would try something different take the mirror mirror approach and interview myself to gage my thoughts on the whole sorry affair!

Q1: Can you describe how you felt after reading this infamous interview?

Angry, disappointed, frustrated, betrayed, hungry, relieved. Quite a collection of emotions! Anger at any player that can pull such a stunt when he has the honour of wearing the famous red and having a stadium sing songs made for him, when I would chew off both arms for the privilege (despite this probably resulting in failing my medical).

Disappointment in him and myself that the interview was given and my reaction to it. Betrayal that after everything the club and fans have done for him this is his response, hungry as I hadn’t eaten in a couple of hours and relieved as for the first time there is no doubt in where he stands.

Q2: You mention betrayal; do you regret your actions in defending him amidst Evragate and bitegate?

No, no I don’t. During those times where he dragged this historic club’s name through the dirt, my issue was never seeking to absolve him of any blame. The issue and basis of my defence was his treatment at the hands of the FA.

A joke of a trial which would have been laughed at in a real court followed by a ban unsubstantiated when held against comparable issues. The way was treated was as disgraceful as his behaviour and that is the bigger issue.

Q3. He claims that the club made a promise to let him leave and are now reneging on it, this is fair enough right?

In isolation I could see an argument for it, but as with everything it can’t be taken in isolation. Once again this season Suarez disgraced the club with his actions, being banned once more. In every contract there will be certain actions that make aspects null and void. I imagine Liverpool will point to his repeat behaviour and subsequent ban as doing this.
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Who is to say had he not been banned for a best part of a quarter of his time in red we wouldn’t have made the Champions League? Besides, IF true and Liverpool reneged on an agreement, it will be karma, I remember a certain someone promising to shake Evra’s hand before a match! How did that go?

Q4. He defended you on the pitch though?

Do me a favour, on the pitch he is paid, very well, to be brilliant and score goals. He did his job, admittedly to a very high level last season, but still his job. Sadly, despite every goal, crucial or not, he scored this was overshadowed by his behaviour. I’m not sure how he could repair the damage he caused the club and important people such as Kenny Dalglish, bar winning the club the league.

Q5. He said the fans would understand?

Shows how removed he is from reality. For someone from such humble beginnings you would think he would have appreciation for such a passionate fanbase who Steven Gerrard correctly stated would find a way to the moon if the club played there.

The fans have been metaphorically bashed from pillar to post in their defence of him and their support, they would expect more loyalty. Claims he isn’t leaving for a local rival or to hurt Liverpool yet a potential move to Arsenal ticks both those boxes. He talks about honour yet has shown none.

Q6. Are you surprised he speaks so freely with the media he despises?

Not at all. Yet again, his talk of honour is far removed from his actions. It amazes me how the interviews and stories only transpire when in Uruguay or away from club. Cowardly some might say.

Q7. Do you fear legal action?

Nope, but I would not invite it. I don’t want this club to see the inside of a court room again! I have trust in John Henry mind; his legal knowledge must be pretty impressive to outfox H&G. I would suggest legal action would not end well for Suarez or Arsenal for that matter.

Q8. Do you fear him going to Arsenal?

I did, but now I don’t really care. This is the proverbial straw to my camel’s back. It’s an odd move by the Gunners as he comes with a ban and a lot of baggage! A ticking timebomb. Who is to say he wouldn’t screw them over for Madrid in a year?

Q9. What would you do with him?

I would love to take the stance City did with Tevez, especially in World Cup Year. Ideally sell abroad, but hey if he wants Champions League so bad, why don’t we loan him to Celtic? They have it right?

I think I could go on and on, but I think my point is clear! Let me know any question you have on this affair or answers that are different? I’m on Twitter @timdibs

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