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Broken Rules, Stupid Laws: Football Needs a Revolution

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This semi-punishment is about as awkward as a third wheel on Valentines Day, Robin Van Persie can confirm that. His yellow card and sending off against Barcelona is a disgraceful decision that exposed bad refereeing and bad use of the card. The Dutchman was given his second yellow for taking a shot within one second of the referees whistle at the rowdy, noisy Camp Nou, even the hardest authoritarian would forgive the forward from giving Arsenal their first shot on goal. The yellow card is proving insufficient at even it’s most basic function, calming down players. I challenge anybody to find me a game that has been calmed down by yellow cards. Instead, as is so often the case, the game descends into a tense, edgy encounter which only raises the temperature.

The recent Manchester United – Liverpool game nearly combusted at one point, half time was the only reason nobody got sent off, yet there was the referee, flashing his card about (incorrectly) and it achieved nothing. If a higher profile game was needed to raise awareness of the yellow card issue, see last years World Cup Final and after 15 yellow cards, we were treated to the worst final in decades. The only impact a yellow card seems to have these days is punishing celebrations and ruining games with decisions that leave fans halfway between shouting at the referee and scratching their heads. Imagine a howling monkey scratching it’s head and multiply it by 40,000 and you’re left with the general imagery of a Premier League crowd when the majority of yellow cards are dished out.

Naturally, there needs to be a middle punishment, one that isn’t as petulant as the yellow card and this is where football should take precedent from other sports. The sin-bin idea is pretty much fool proof, for every offense the player should be given an extended sin-bin time, therefore it’s the players prerogative to help his team. Every match that takes place is likely to leave 50% of the crowd disappointed, but that shouldn’t be due to sloppiness by those charged with safeguarding the game.

It seems almost too easy to be true, but instead of having ‘two extra officials’ who stand behind the goals, why not have two officials who sit and watch TV replays during the game. From this point, they can inform the referee of offenses he may have missed and be there to confirm crucial decisions where there is an element of doubt.

A straight red, most people will agree, can be considered a fair option. Some players deserve to be sent straight off. An automatic 3-game suspension should not be a concrete punishment. There are many different types of sending off offenses, one punishment is not enough to rule them all (Lawyers – this sentence has no intended reference to Lord of the Rings). A handball on the goal-line can receive the same suspension and punishment as a straight up punch. Once again, someone needs to rip the rule book up and rewrite it.

Despite the endless list of ‘why’s’ and constant puzzlement, we must remember the biggest ‘why’ of all. Why is Mr Blatter still at the wheel of this globalized circus? Elections are soon and candidates are to make themselves known by the end of the month. Will anybody step up to be counted? Is there anyone who has the humility and bravery to innovate the game we love and despise all the same?

Who will save us? No, not you Sepp.

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INTRODUCING THE WINDOWS PHONE 7!

This week it is Liverpool midfielder Albert Aquilani’s former girlfriend Pamela Camassa!

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