Another Bad Hair Day – Where Do We Go From Here?

WE wuz Robinned. That’s about all we can say, us Reds whose weekend has just been trashed by a certain flying Dutchman.

In previous posts I’d been crying out for a Liverpool formation which would take the attack to the opponents from the start, would play an intrusive passing game which would get our strikers into the box, and would keep possession and actually DO something with it. The fairy godmother granted my wish. But there’s always something in the small print with fairy godmothers…

One thing you can always expect from Arsenal is some silly hair. We’ve all got used to Bacary Sagna and his two-tones. And Alex Song was sporting something really quite bizarre. But guess which two players provided the long and perfectly placed passes for van Persie to perpetrate his daylight robbery…the guys with the barmy barnets duly wrapped up the three points. And it was Liverpool who had the bad hair day.

It started so well. We had a corner inside thirty seconds. Suárez had a brilliant game, played in as often as not by our own Dutchman Dirk Kuyt. We were all over them from the kick-off. Respect to Szczesny who parried our best thrusts again and again and again. (But why do opposing goalkeepers always seem to play blinders against Liverpool? Yes, I know, whinge, whinge, whinge.)

Three things have come to be taken as read by Liverpool supporters; close encounters with the woodwork, missed penalties and goals conceded out of nowhere. On Saturday we had them all. After 18 minutes Suárez went on one of his winding runs into the box and won a controversial penalty – Szczesny had done everything he could to get his leg out of the way but contact was made. The secret to winning penalties, as Michael Owen always knew, is not to dive but to make opponents foul you. El Pistolero has got that to perfection.

But what can you do when a goalie is on that sort of form? Szczesny dived to his right to save Kuyt’s penalty, and then immediately to his left to push out Dirk’s rebound shot. The sort of performance every bloody goalie saves up for Liverpool.

Still, it didn’t seem to matter, as five minutes later a Henderson cross was sliced into his own net by the spiky-haired Koscielny – a goal that any striker would have been proud of. But it wasn’t long before scores were level – a long ball into the centre saw van Persie muscle himself the right side of Carragher to score. Liverpool have been trying to score from the long ball all season – but then we haven’t got van Persie, and have to manoeuvre the ball into the box. The defence can hardly be blamed here – Carragher may not be as quick as Daniel Agger, but he can organise a back four. But with van Persie on the loose, the lack of pace proved fatal.

Up the other end, meanwhile, Suárez hit the post after a many-sided Liverpool attack which deserved better. Later, Kuyt poked the ball against the upright after a penalty-box melee. That makes 21 knock-on-woods this season.

Arsenal were rather more on level terms in the second half, but Liverpool still had the best chances. One of the most maddening saw a perfect Suárez pass across goal fall at the feet of the improbable Martin Kelly, who hadn’t a clue what to do with it. The eight minutes of injury time, following a serious injury to Arteta, gave us all hope at 1-1, but this hope was mocked when Alex Song lofted an inch-perfect pass to guess-who who volleyed it into the net. No-one at fault because no-one could have expected it. Arsenal had nicked the game through an incredible striker who had hardly touched the ball apart from his two scoring shots. Isn’t that what we bought Andy Carroll for?

Well, at this rate we might almost as well shut up shop and park the bleeding bus at home, as we’ve been doing all season. We did everything right, except for getting the ball in the net, and yet we lost. The lesson is – if you can’t bury the spherical object, it doesn’t matter what else you do.

Meanwhile, we’re still seventh, as close to Newcastle in sixth as we are to the blue shite in 13th. No, we are not going to make fourth this season. Fulham and Stoke are breathing down our necks. Somehow we are going to have to score some bloody GOALS!

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